Thursday, April 29, 2010
i kne i whine alot abt my life.. but sometimes i really jus cant help it.. i also kne that i'm very fucked up.. it's like 身在福中不知福.. but seriously.. i'm jus damn 不知足 lah.. zzz.. argh..
i kne one has to build up one's own life.. whether it's interesting or nt is so up to him or her to make it.. but still.. haiz.. it's seriously nt easy to be done.. everytime i see my frens being overseas having fun.. travelling all over the world, i get damn jealous.. it's like, why can other pple go overseas and i cant? y muz i be stuck in singapore.. i wanna go travel too.. i wanna see the world..
but seriously, wat am i doing about it.. a big NOTHING.. yes, i sure do look at tour packages and thing of there i wanna go.. but in the end.. it's still jus like tat.. i wont buy those packages.. obviously coz i cannot afford them.. and when i try to save up to travel.. it takes like forever.. and nw, i cant jus save up to travel, coz saving for marriage is priority.. so.. haiz..
i'm nt complaining that i dont wanna get married.. i wan.. but also.. when i look at myself after being wif johnny, it seems that i've changed alot.. yes.. of coz i've change alot for the better.. but also.. i'm getting very dependent on him.. extremely dependent.. it's like whenever i wanna do someting, i have to get permission.. even though i call it respecting him by telling him, others feel that i'm losing control of my own life.. is it me or him going to do certain things.. it's not his life i'm living but my own.. i so understand that, but it's like i'm not acting on it..
dont u jus tink i'm damn fucked up.. argh.. i seriously hate myself this way..
nw, i'm learning on how to not 埋怨.. because i shouldnt whine abt things.. well, that's also one ting that he wants me to change.. i know things happen in one's life for a reason.. and God definitely has a very good reason for everything that happens to us.. but.. sometimes it's like.. y y and y..
why am i jus this fucked up.. i really hate myself sometimes.. hate myself for being so fucked up and too lazy to do anithing abt it.. argh
zzz.. see.. i'm whining again.. i'm jus damn screwed up dont u tink.. haiz.. zzz
blue @ 9:48 AM
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Wednesday, April 28, 2010
good morning.. ^^
coming to work everyday really needs determination.. it's nt that i dont like wat i'm doing here, but seriously, it's getting me real lack of sleep.. i'm so tired.. i really need a day off to sleep..
i have 3 days left of my offs.. and i have like 6 weeks more to go.. so i muz make sure i plan it well.. last week of may definitely cannot be taken coz it's week 20 of IA.. the prof will be coming down one day.. n i dunno which day yet.. so most prob i wont take off on that day..
hm.. dunno lah.. really need to tink.. but i really need to sleep.. extremely in need of sleep..
kk.. i tink mayb i'll blog again later.. need to start working le..
buaiz~~
blue @ 8:13 AM
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Tuesday, April 27, 2010
very horrible of me.. but i dun care.. haha.. i'm blogging during office hours again..
it's jus after lunch hour.. so i'm v sleepy and seriously dont feel like doing much work..
it seems that my inital urge to blog has gone away.. all of a sudden i dont kne wat to write and dun feel like writing animore.. LOL.. zzz
kk.. will update when i have the feeling to update... haha..
blue @ 1:18 PM
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Wednesday, April 14, 2010
blogging during office hours.. LOL.. so bad of me.. =p
aniway, it's been weeks since i last updated.. so.. i'm gonna update a little here..
on good friday (2nd apr), i went to jb with a group of my uni friends for karting.. seriously, it was damn fun.. stupid of me for nt bringing a camera.. forgot.. haha.. (oh, shiyin, how's ur new camera? me tinking abt getting it too.. considering G11 n S90, which one better? LOL)
aniway, i felt i was quite odd one out lah.. coz the rest of the gers who go are wif their bf and i'm like.. zzz.. there's another ger w/o bf, but one of the guys stuck to her the entire trip.. so i guess it's still better than me, without anione..
kk, so the day was like this: we agreed to meet up at 9.45am, but obviously pple are late.. den we spent like more than an hour to finally be in malaysia.. reaching at abt 12plus, we decided to go for lunch.. bak kut teh at sentosa.. super yummy and extremely cheap.. LOL.. den it was karting time.. it was fun.. except for one idiot who crashed.. he was injured lah.. nt extremely badly, but he flew off the kart.. lucky his legs are damn long n got trapped, so he only suffered from a bad ankle sprain and some torn skin on his hands.. we were damn worried lah.. so after karting, we went ard looking for a chinese doctor for him.. went ard a few places, finally finding one.. after the doc, we went to a place similar to the minds cafe in sg.. it's called “疯人馆”.. the atmosphere is so much better than minds.. coz it's bigger.. more spacious and not as noisy.. a good place to relax wif frenz lor.. but since they are new, they dont hav as much games lah.. den after that, we went for seafood dinner.. den after we came back to sg lor..
after that trip, i'm like so damn lazy for work.. LOL.. super no mood.. holiday mood onli.. haiz.. and it's already week 14.. 8 more weeks will end le.. meaning in the nx few weeks, i muz start working on my report.. zzz.. i so dun like.. i hate reports.. seriously coz my english is not powerful.. so it's like shit.. argh..
AHHHH... shiyin.. hee.. English Teacher Miss Ho, can u be kind enough to help me edit my report after I'm done with it? It'll definitely be after your examinations.. Please.. LOL
hahahahaha..
kk.. i muz stop here.. later my sup see den i die.. LOL.. buaiz~
blue @ 8:54 AM
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