Saturday, March 31, 2007
i've been sick for more than a week already.. zzz.. wat's wrong wif me??? i jus cant stop coughing.. n it doesnt seem to be getting ani better..
HELP!!!
blue @ 11:02 PM
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Wednesday, March 28, 2007
zzz.. i dunno wat's happening to me.. i tink i'm really crazy already.. coz i'm sick like hell.. argh.. mayb tat's the reason.. i dunno..
i've overslp tis morning for the meeting tat we had wif the club advisor.. i wasnt extremely late.. but late nevertheless.. most of the things hav been spoken by vj n houston already.. i went there more like to show face.. den after tat.. i slacked wif the gang.. did my IS enrollment.. i was glad tat finally after so long, the 3 gers hav the same IS.. it was planned tat we were gonna hav a game at 4.30.. it's more of photo taking than game.. but i was like so sick so i decided nt to bring my stuffs since i wasnt gonna play wif my current idiot situation.. so i really did nothing much there.. jus hanged ard.. n even so, i jus stayed for like a damn short period of time.. coz johnny keeps saying tat he's tired n wat time i could leave sch.. although i was missing him quite bad n wanted to see him soon, but i felt real bad tat i had to leave the guys early.. coz it was part of my responsibility as a vp to be present during events like those.. in the end, i left at 5pm n went to find johnny n we came home for dinner.. kfc.. i tink i'm really digging my own grave.. coz i at mac for lunch, drank bubble tea n had kfc.. zzz.. i'm plain mad..
aniway.. the main ting tat i'm really upsad abt is coz of sumting tat he did.. like i said, he's been complaining tat he's tired n wants to go home n rest.. so i let him off at abt 7.30.. after he left, he told me tat he forgot to bring his keys n his parents wont be back until abt 9.. if it were u, u were so near to ur gf's place compared to ur own home where u dont hav the key to enter, would u hav come back to ur gf's place? if it were me, i would hav definitely went to my partner's place.. but.. the biggest but is tat he decided to take 154 n den go ntuc n walk den sit at the playground n wait.. wtf.. i was so pissed off, disappointed n depressed.. was it so hard to jus take one short bus trip back to my place since he's onli reached jp.. wont it be better??? at least i've got a bed in my room for u to rest.. u'd at least hav me to keep u company.. am i so undependable??? is it so hard for u to fall back on me when there's a problem tat u face?? or is it tat i can onli enjoy the fruits of ur labour n nt work hard wif u..
sometimes i really wonder how truthful are the things tat he say to me.. abt how much he loves me n how badly he wants to bring me home to his parents.. it's like these things are always said but never seem to be done.. i kne he spends alot of time wif me whenever he is able.. it's not tat i haven made the effort to spend loads of time wif him.. but sumtimes it really kills me that when i'm feeling so lonely n depressed, i cant get him to be by my side.. it's like no matter how much he says tat he'll be wif me thru thick n thin, he's nv iterally there by my side.. it seems so much to me tat our relationship might look strong n tat we're so loving together but to me.. it seems like we're drifting apart for some reason n it's like the body is there but the hearts seem to be elsewhere..
i'm nt sure of myself.. i'm nt sure of him as much as i was.. it's like.. i'm once again losing faith in the relationship for no good reason..
am i jus crazy?? or is there really sumting wrong wif our relationship?? i seriously dunno..
blue @ 1:26 AM
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Monday, March 26, 2007
dunno y.. i'm sick again.. zzz.. seems like my body is very weak these days..
i'm down wif flu n cough.. seems like common cold to me.. but i wont kne since i'm nt visiting the doc.. i dun see the reason behind wasting the money for normal medicine.. summore i dun need an mc as well..
my throat keeps feeling itchy n thus i keep coughing like hell.. argh.. the feeling really sucks.. i hate being ill.. makes me feel like a useless creature..
aniway.. gotta go to sch in the morning tml for a meeting wif the club advisor.. den in the afternoon we'll be making a banner for the cca fiesta.. den in the evening, we might be having a game to take photos n stuffs.. yapz.. hope everything will be according to plan.. i'm too sick n my brain doesnt seem to wanna work more than the usual load of keeping myself awake n alive..
LOL.. zzz.. i'm tired again.. n i'm sweating liaoz.. better go rest in front of the fan.. buaiz..
blue @ 7:44 PM
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Wednesday, March 21, 2007
in abt 3 weeks time.. sch's gonna start again.. i wonder if it's a good ting or nt.. coz sch start means i'll be in year 3.. means it's gonna be graduation soon..
well, i hav a good news to tell.. i'm the new vice-president of my cca.. hee.. rmb i'm playing flag football.. yapz.. tat's my cca.. n i'm the new vp.. =p
coz flag football is still a new sport in singapore.. nt many pple really kne how to play it.. there are much more pple who hasnt even heard tis sport at all.. including our new advisor in charge.. LOL..
aniway, flag is a new cca in np.. it'll onli be an official cca in the coming sem.. n since it's new.. there's loads of things to do abt it.. we've got club tees, logos n lots to deside.. the new committee has jus been set up nt real long again.. actually onli on monday.. haha.. but i hope tis group of us will work hard together to get the club function well n be classified under sports by nx year rather than under special interest grp..
so tml.. i've gotta go meet up wif the president. who is nobody else but vj.. haha.. actually i was given the choice of being p or vp.. but in the end, i got vp coz the previous p said tat it'll look better to hav a guy as the p since flag is still male dominated game.. which is so so true.. there's onli a total of 2 gers including me in the team.. LOL..
aniway.. i hope i can do a good job.. haha.. which i believe i can lah.. since i'm given the chance.. i'll make sure i prove tat i'm capable of holding a high post.. since i've never been given the chance to do so in college..
kk.. i tink i shd go already.. gotta do some research on the club tee n logo design.. buaiz.. =p
blue @ 1:03 PM
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Wednesday, March 14, 2007
wah.. it's been super long since i've previously blogged.. well.. was it very long ago? i cant rmb liaoz...
aniway.. i jus got jobless again.. LOL.. it wasnt a real job tat i've been working lah.. i jus went back to sch to help regina be peer tutor for her year 3 students on pro/e... i had xiaowei there too.. haha..
zzz.. jus got our results today.. same gpa as last sem lor.. 3.86.. got AD for EM3B, IA n thermo.. A+ for AM, A for MP.. den both my IS got B...okay lah.. nt excellent results.. but really nt bad already.. at least i didnt do as bad as i thought i would for AM..
sianz.. johnny's gonna start teaching nx week le.. gonna teach at nan hua primary sch.. yapz.. clementi there de.. nt bad lah.. quite near his place.. but i think the damn sianz thing is he gotta go to sch on fri for sum lessons/workshop on chinese.. dunno wat.. but he has to attend tat.. n he also got moe's sum preparation course/workshop to attend on coming mon n tues in town.. zzz.. damn sianz.. although i'm happy for him tat he's able to start doing sumting he's always wanted.. he's always wanted to be a teacher.. n i'm glad tat he's able to start his career liaoz.. but i dun like it tat we dont really hav much time together.. coz i really wanna spend more time wif him..
but sumtimes, i really wonder if i'm crazy or sumting.. coz at times.. i'll feel irritated by him.. n irritated wif him.. sumtimes i jus cant stand the tings he do/say.. zzz.. i think i'm crazy liaoz.. insane.. argh..
one more month of holiday to go.. my parents keep wanting me to go find job.. but i really dun feel like working at all.. den i dun really wanna slack at home also.. zzz.. wanna spend time wif my darling but he wont hav the time for me.. haiz..
btw.. we're having lesser n lesser time to go out together liaoz.. saturadays used to be the time when we go out together.. like shopping or sumting.. but nw.. zzz.. he's gotta go church in the afternoon for singing lessons.. den he's also gotta go church on wed nite for choir practice.. den sunday is his usual church session.. it's like the usual time for me all gone liaoz.. he's spending so much time more in church than wif me.. i really dun like it.. make me feel so lonely..
zzz.. sumtimes i really dun wanna talk abt him.. coz i feel neglected by him.. aiya.. dunno lah.. zzz
blue @ 8:59 PM
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Saturday, March 03, 2007
I AM PISSED OFF!!!
ARGH!!!
blue @ 11:05 PM
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