Wednesday, November 30, 2005
i met up wif johnny today.. coz he suddenly got night out.. well.. i still feel devastated..
talked to him abt me feeling lost.. well.. he's nt much of a help.. he say he's my direction.. well.. although true, but nt helping... den he say, go read the bible...
okie lor..
devastated...
blue @ 11:45 PM
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kill me?
blue @ 2:21 PM
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i feel like crying for myself.. the pathetic soul..
blue @ 12:32 AM
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Tuesday, November 29, 2005
hm.. i've jus completed one of the novels today after dinner.. well.. actually can finish before dinner de.. coz onli left 1 page.. but mum nagging like mad.. so i had to put the book down n start makaning..
well.. nw.. i'm gonna either start reading alvin's book or other library book or start doing puzzle.. well.. it's my b'day puzzle.. LOL.. the one frm alvin, wenda n miao.. haha.. haven opened it at all.. nt haven open lah.. open le.. but.. haven started.. i wanna go tt.. but.. will take quite sum time n i dun really tink i hav the place in my house to do it.. as u kne, my room is so small.. den.. well.. i wanna do at the dining table.. but how can.. den makan where? rite.. so.. well.. i dunno.. haha.. see first ba.. =p
hm.. i dunno wat i wanna do tonite.. mayb jus slp early for once.. LOL.. coz every time i say i wanna sleep le.. i end up doing sumting else.. like reading or listening to music.. or sumting.. so i always end up sleeping at 2 or 3 or 4 or even 5.. LOL.. yapz.. so.. well.. i might slp by 1 today.. haha.. i kne it's still late.. but it's earlier than usual le.. =p
tink i go get more water.. i like drinking alot of plain water tis days too.. feel good to hav water.. hehe..
buaiz
blue @ 11:42 PM
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well.. i jus read alvin's tag.. hm.. where's nemo... good question.. LOL
i actually read back the previous entries that i had.. entries frm the start.. well.. i admit i've changed.. nt totally.. but quite a lot i guess..
dont human change wif time? LOL.. excuse for myself.. haha.. hm.. one good ting is tat i start reading much more than before.. although it's all rubbish novels.. but.. at least i read.. n.. erm.. well.. nothing else.. haha..
i kne i'm being all obsessed wif him.. i jus cant help it.. well.. i'd love to go out wif my frenz.. but.. sumtimes.. hm.. dunno how to say.. i've realised that after graduation.. i dont like to speak so much.. seriously i dont like speaking.. haha.. i prefer keeping my mouth shut.. but if i keep them shut in front of frenz, i feel weird myself.. so i force myself to speak.. haha.. seriously, sometimes when i'm with him.. i dont speak tt much also.. well.. we dont really speak tt much.. hm.. nt really dont lah.. haha.. well.. we do chat.. hm.. haha.. i dunno lah...
i'm in a dilema... whole big one.. LOL.. a dilema abt who i am.. well.. nvm.. i'm jus siao liaoz.. =p
zzz.. i haven had lunch.. i go makan first..
buaiz
blue @ 1:14 PM
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Sunday, November 27, 2005
zzz..
i'm sleepy.. well.. i got 2 books frm the library again.. 1 today lah.. the other one i got it on friday.. haven started though..
well.. he's back in camp again n i tink lights out le.. so he's sleeping again.. hm.. he shd go slp lah.. coz i dont tink he had sufficient slp during his weekend.. coz.. well.. i'm part of the reason.. he couldnt slp long on saturday coz we met up.. well.. coz he had to go for church performance on tt evening.. so means we couldnt hav the evening together.. so he had to find other time for me.. so is morning n afternoon lor.. den sunday.. well.. he has to go for church.. so it means sundays are times when he definitely couldnt slp late..
yapz.. since his 2 weekend days are spent on other matters rather than sleeping.. he definitely doesnt get sufficient rest.. i seriously plan to let him hav a real long rest during his coming block leave.. erm.. tat's provided tt he's staying wif me lah.. coz i hav my ways in keeping him in bed till mayb lunch time.. however when he's at home.. he'll usually wakes up latest 10..
but one bad ting when he stays wif me is tt i usually dont like to slp early.. hehe.. so he has to stay up wif me.. but well.. if i really wanna make him hav sufficient rest, i'll make him slp early n wake up late.. =p coz i'm well known to be THE PIG.. LOL..
hm.. well.. almost time for me to slp already.. i promised him jus now tt i wont slp too late today.. well.. i said b4 11.30... n it's almost 11 already.. n since i'm kinda dying coz i wake up early this 3 days to meet up wif him.. i'm sleeping le..
nite nitez..
buaiz
blue @ 10:58 PM
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Friday, November 25, 2005
Celine Dion - Because You Loved Me
For all those times you stood by me
For all the truth that you made me see
For all the joy you brought to my life
For all the wrong that you made right
For every dream you made come true
For all the love I found in you
I'll be forever thankful baby
You're the one who held me up
Never let me fall
You're the one who saw me through through it all
You were my strength when I was weak
You were my voice when I couldn't speak
You were my eyes when I couldn't see
You saw the best there was in me
Lifted me up when I couldn't reach
You gave me faith 'coz you believed
I'm everything I am
Because you loved me
You gave me wings and made me fly
You touched my hand I could touch the sky
I lost my faith, you gave it back to me
You said no star was out of reach
You stood by me and I stood tall
I had your love I had it all
I'm grateful for each day you gave me
Maybe I don't know that much
But I know this much is true
I was blessed because I was loved by you
You were my strength when I was weak
You were my voice when I couldn't speak
You were my eyes when I couldn't see
You saw the best there was in me
Lifted me up when I couldn't reach
You gave me faith 'coz you believed
I'm everything I am
Because you loved me
You were always there for me
The tender wind that carried me
A light in the dark shining your love into my life
You've been my inspiration
Through the lies you were the truth
My world is a better place because of you
You were my strength when I was weak
You were my voice when I couldn't speak
You were my eyes when I couldn't see
You saw the best there was in me
Lifted me up when I couldn't reach
You gave me faith 'coz you believed
I'm everything I am
Because you loved me
blue @ 11:07 PM
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Thursday, November 24, 2005
help.. anione has tat stupid dreamweaver program.. damn sia.. i dun hav.. LOL.. well, i've always been using the lousy frontpage to do my webby n stuffs.. my bro said tat it's an idiotic program n wants me to use dreamweaver instead.. well.. alright.. i'm looking for it nw..
sianz.. i'm so bored.. zzz
cant wait to see johnny tml.. tt's provided tat he doesnt get confined or charged due to last week's stupid event.. well.. i hope everything will be fine.. yarlor.. if he can book out, it means tt we'll be able to meet in the afternoon.. n can watch harry potter tml.. yaeh.. tml they having halfday.. so i really pray tat he can book out.. really...
hm.. wat's my bro doing sia.. still arranging the photos we took at taiwan.. so many.. n they really taking a beri long time.. he's helping me dunno doing wat to my com.. n he's nw outside..
well.. i go hurry him.. LOL
buaiz
blue @ 11:53 PM
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LOL.. rmb in my previous entry tat i said i wanted to slp already n it's 3plus.. well.. the powerful me ended up slping at 6am.. LOL.. power ba.. haha.. coz i ended up doing sum scan for my com n i also updated sum songs into my mp3.. it's so outdated.. LOL..
hm.. i'm damn hungry nw.. well.. nt tt extreme yet lah.. but i'm hungry.. LOL.. i'm a pig.. =p
dunno wat to say.. having headache as well.. dunno y.. LOL..
buaiz
blue @ 6:53 PM
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muahahaha...
wao.. i didnt realise it's so late already.. =p
aniway, i changed the song of my blog again.. hm.. i forgot wat i put the previous time.. i tink is i'm your angel.. i tink.. LOL.. well.. i like tis song better.. much better.. =p
it's called because you loved me.. i put the same song onto my friendster profile as well.. hehe.. hm.. i tink i might change to another song there.. i'm also looking for others songs to put elsewhere.. hehe..
i'm looking to Diana Ross's Love Is All That Matters.. if anione has tat mp3.. can u be kind enuff so send it to me? haha.. i've been searching all over for it.. but couldnt find.. n dear wenda is nt online, so couldnt ask him.. lol..
nvm.. i'll continue searching.. hehe.. =p
i'm tried already.. hav been waking up real late tis days n my mum is nagging.. guess wat time i wake up.. LOL.. 2.30pm.. haha.. well.. u cant blame me.. i also dunno y i wake up to late.. i guess it's all coz of my late nite.. yapz..
so i tink i shd slp already.. nitez.. =p
blue @ 3:09 AM
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Monday, November 21, 2005
let's blog abt ytd.. =p
it was concert day.. yapz.. niesb concert day.. i had fun, but was real tired too.. i didnt expect the first half of the concert took an hr.. LOL.. coz i thought it's jus tt couple of songs.. how long can it really take? =p
well, first half was chant n jubilo, a tribute to harry james, first suite in e flat for military band n armenian dances (part 2).. my favourite song among these is armenian dances.. well.. it's the hardest piece among these few songs.. n it's the most fun one.. =p
second half was alvamar overture, selections of malay folk songs, yesterday/hey jude, big band showcase + happy birthday n morning noon n night overture.. my favourite is morning noon n night overture.. we call it MNN... =p it's a very challenging piece for, well, me.. LOL.. all the high n running notes.. the highest note being played in the piece is, well, high high b flat.. n it's the highest note tt can be played by a flute.. i tink.. LOL
after tt.. 2 encore pieces.. instant concert n japanese graffiti 4.. i like jap.. it's real nice.. =p althought i seriously onli played it twice.. LOL.. yapz..
hm.. after the concert, me johnny alvin n wenda went to orchard.. yapz.. eh.. taka to be specific.. =p ate at coffee club.. yeapz.. i like wat i ate last night.. it's real nice.. eh.. seafood sumting.. LOL.. i forgot it's name.. quantity is quite alot.. couldnt finish it.. =p n the quality is also good.. =p yum yum..
after dinner.. which was like 8 plus i tink.. we went walking ard.. eh.. where did we go.. oh.. paragon... den after tt borders.. yapz. seriously, i was real tired.. n johnny was feeling the same too.. so we went home.. took cab.. he paid.. =p
yapz.. he came over to stay at my place last night.. curious y he didnt hav to book in.. coz he took leave jus to be wif me for an extra day.. hehe.. sweet ba.. LOL.. yarlor.. well, i wanted to hav more time wif him as well..
we slpt till 11 plus today.. i made him sleep so long.. coz or else he'll wake up to early n will be lack of slp again.. once again, like my mum said, we squeezed on my bed.. LOL.. it's jus a super single mattress.. so well, nt really tt squeezy.. but still slping alone will me more comfortable.. but.. feeling his warmth is much better than more space.. =p
i'll stop here nw.. coz.. well.. i jus finish shower n felt like blogging so i started typing.. n i'm.. u kne.. LOL.. naked.. LOL.. =p
buaiz
blue @ 10:33 PM
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Friday, November 18, 2005
zzz.. i'm hungry..
ate onli bread for lunch.. damn hungry nw.. sianz.. zzz
forget it.. i go find food.. =p
blue @ 3:34 PM
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lol.. well, i changed the song again.. =p
tis time, it's i'm your angel.. hehe.. yar.. hehe.. =p
nitez.. LOL
blue @ 2:23 AM
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damn.. the song wont be heard le.. coz the alvin's account kana banned.. LOL.. i uploaded the song to alvin's account n it got banned.. sorry alvin.. LOL..
nvm.. i put midi inside.. diff song.. but.. nvm.. lOL.. tis one is called everything i do i do it for you.. yapz.. coz lazy to find other songs.. so i jus put tis.. yapz.. =p
hm.. zzz.. i'm tired.. i tink i go slp le..
nitez
blue @ 2:08 AM
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Thursday, November 17, 2005
hello.. LOL..
like the background song? =p i jus got it up.. got the song frm wenda.. thanks man.. =p hehe.. kne wat tis song is? it's the song tt chicken little was dancing to.. yapz.. i tink it's real cut.. so i got it on.. =p
hm.. nothing much to do nw.. well.. still dunno if he'll be able to hav night out or not.. coz well.. i said ytd tat sumting bad happened.. it's his gun misfiring.. so now still dunno yet.. whether the punishment will be watever..
i've been praying real hard since yesterday.. hope tat he'll be okay n those in-charged, who ever they are, will forget everything.. =p yarlor.. i really miss him very much n wanna see him quite badly..
hm... nothing much for me to do now.. i feel like mapling.. haven played for quite sum time le.. yapz.. i'm off..
buaiz
blue @ 2:12 PM
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Wednesday, November 16, 2005
hi pple, as u can see, i'm back.. =p
been a good 7 days i guess.. well, it could be better if i was there wif johnny instead of my parents.. coz mum's too naggy le..
well, nvm.. she's always like tt.. although i muz admit that i hate it.. but no matter wat she's still my mum.. so.. forget it..
nw, the onli thing i'm worried abt is johnny.. coz i jus got to kne tat he's gotten into trouble at army.. n i hope he's all fine n wont get charged or confined or anithing... i miss him like crazy n if i cant see him tis weekend.. i'll really die..
hm.. miao.. u kne how to go to singapore conference hall? jus take mrt to tanjong pagar can le.. shd be walking distance i hope.. =p oh, i kept one ticket for u le.. yapz.. anione else wanna go?
haiz, i'm still very worried abt johnny.. help.. argh..
blue @ 8:57 PM
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Monday, November 07, 2005
well pple, i'll be leaving for taiwan early tml morning..
i'll be back nx monday night..
oh, miao, i'll keep one concert ticket for u.. jus pay me $10 on the day of the concert itself can le.. btw, if anione wants to go for it, it's on 20 novemeber 2005, 5pm at Singapore Conference Hall.. each ticket cost $10.. i still hav tickets unsold.. so if anione wanna go, leave me a msg at my tagboard.. i'll buy the tickets for u and u can pay me on the concert day itself..
cya pple.. take care.. =p
blue @ 11:09 PM
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well, he booked in again today.. yapz
we had a week together.. nt everyday.. but it's block leave for him, so we kinda had more time together.. luckily the timing is right, coz after his block leave, i'll be going to taiwan le..
he stayed at my place for 2 nites.. thursday n friday.. seriously, it's always the best time for me when he stays wif me.. coz being able to slp beside him at night is so sweet.. n waking up in the morning n the first one i get to see is him.. seriously, i've always been telling him how much i wanna be wif him.. as in to hav a home of our own so i can slp by his side everyday n waking up every morning having him as the first person i see..
him booking in tonite means tat we'll hav more than a week nt able to see each other.. i'll be leaving singapore on tuesday morning.. early in the morning.. den will onli come back the nx week.. monday night i tink.. so tt means we wont be able to hear or see each other for the entire week. mayb even 2 weeks if he doesnt hav night's out after i come back..
seriously, i really wonder y i cant leave him.. nt as to LEAVE him as breaking up.. wat i mean is y cant i jus hav my own personal life.. one without him as the main importance... seriously.. i'm really lifeless. i tink tt's horrible.. yapz... totally horrible..
but when in his postion, he tinks tat tis is perfectly find.. n good also.. coz.. well, he's kinda protective in his own ways.. he nv shows it in front of anione else.. but well, i can see it.. haha.. yapz.. i can see wat's up his mind.. he's a MCP.. lol.. yapz.. =p
aniway.. argh.. i'll continue later.. coz gotta go pack the lugguage.. bro wants it repacked in our own way rather than dad's way... LOL..
buaiz
blue @ 12:11 AM
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Wednesday, November 02, 2005
ello.. =p
i've been busy tis few days with nothing.. haha.. well, nt really nothing.. been spending most of my time wif johnny.. yapz.. today is tuesday.. erm... wednesday already.. lol
he booked out on monday afternoon.. i had lunch wif him at causeway point.. did a little bit of walking ard n watching the legend of zorro which he insist tat we watch.. den after the show we went home.. den on tuesday, he came over to my place.. we met at abt 12 for lunch at gek poh.. den walked ard there for awhile.. den came back to my place.. we did nothing much.. lol.. well, we watch the mask of zorro.. haha.. he bought the vcd over coz i said tat i nv watched it b4.. =p
den after the show.. well, coz my parents wanted to go over to my aunt's place to swim.. we spent quite sum time debating whether he shd come alone.. in the end.. he won lah.. i told my parents that i wasnt going wif them.. yarlor.. jus for him.. den we didnt hav dinner wif them either.. means i ended up cooking for him.. haha.. tt guy.. he said tat if we stayed home, he'll prepare dinner for me.. however, in the end i was the one cooking again.. haha.. well.. i guess it's really okay.. coz preparing dinner wif him is nice.. hehe..
okay.. dinner didnt mean we cook up lotsa dishes or anithing.. we had the usual lousy dinner.. maggi mee.. plus i fried sotong balls n he insisted tat we eat pizza.. dun get it wrong.. we didnt order pizza frm outside.. my mum has those ready made pizza in the freezer.. those small kinda pizza.. so i baked/toasted one jus for him..
den we ate in front of my com.. haha.. my new lcd monitor.. we watched yet ani other movie.. it's called drink drank drunk.. a hongkong movie.. yapz.. nt tt bad lah.. average rated show...
den jus when the movie finished, my parents came back.. n we realised tt it's already 9.30.. so i let him go home.. although as usual i'll be so unwilling to let him leave.. but coz i kne if he doesnt go back soon.. his mum will be nagging again.. haha.. yapz..
hm.. the reason y i haven slp at tis time is coz i jus finished ironing the clothes.. mum made me iron all the clothes.. coz she say i nv do anithing at home n she's tired.. n tt she wanted to "clear" those clothes b4 we leave for taiwan nx week.. yarlor.. sianz..
i'm actually quite tired nw.. but i've still gotta pack my stuffs for tml.. i'll be going swimming wif johnny tml.. yapz.. he say he wanna go.. n i also wanna go lah.. been indoors for so long.. i miss the sun.. wanna be in the sun n in the water for awhile.. =p
i tink i'll stop here.. better go pack stuffs le..
buaiz
blue @ 12:46 AM
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