Saturday, August 18, 2007
oh man.. i had a great time out today wif johnny.. well, of coz it's coz of him company.. but there's another thing tat happened tat made me real happy today.. hee..
our initial plan was to go bugis first den go suntec.. den we ended going bugis den go chinatown.. go chinatown coz there's a shopping centre tat sells lotsa collectors toys.. he bought quite a few of his transformers there too.. oh, n my transformer sticker..
aniway, the real nice thing happened there.. hee.. rmb jonathon leong frm the previous singapore idol?? yapz.. tat guy tat i said i like alot.. the voice tat i thought was sexy.. yapz.. tat jonathon leong.. hee.. i saw him..
at first i was like wondering if he's the real guy.. coz he looked so normal.. haha.. as in jus cap, tee n jeans.. den his tee didnt really cover most of his tattoos.. so at first i was like, i didnt kne he had tattoos.. its tat really him.. until i heard his voice.. den i was like 'tat's him alright.. i wont forget that voice of his..' haha..
seriously, i was quite excited.. LOL.. the best part was.. we didnt jus see each other in 1 store.. we went to the same stores.. n to me it's like.. wao.. haha.. like an idiot i kne.. but.. it's still nice.. haha.. although we're strangers n he doesnt kne me.. but at least i kne him.. n it's like, we saw each other.. thou strangers.. but i still saw him.. haha.. nice feeling actually.. haha..
aniway, at least i got to kne one thing abt him.. he's someone who likes toys.. LOL.. nt typical toys.. but collectors stuffs.. figurines.. stuffs like tat.. yapz..
kk.. i shd stop here.. i'm going crazy again.. haha..
nitez.. me go slp already..
blue @ 12:34 AM
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Tuesday, August 14, 2007
i dunno wat to say.. yar.. mayb i was given a second chance n i did nothing abt it.. coz mayb i didnt even kne when was that 2nd chance given.. or mayb i'm jus nt worth bothering abt coz i suck..
let's see.. with the prob of me thinking to highly of myself.. in my own opinion, i do nt.. but of coz, others think otherwise..
when i look into this prob, i believe it's gotta be my attitude when i treat my sch work.. alright, i wont tell anione wat time i started studying for the upcoming papers.. mayb to u it sounds boastful to u when i say i studied onli so such a short time.. so i wont say a word abt it this time.. n to be honest with u.. everytime when i say abt wat time i started studying n how long i took, i dont hav a hidden agenda.. i'm nt trying to say, 'see, i can finish studying in such a short period of time'.. i nv meant tat.. i worry abt myself when i spend so little time studying tat's y i ask alot of qns whenever i hav the chance b4 the actual paper starts.. i blame myself all the time for nt studying longer.. but i jus cant help it.. i cant get myself to sit in front of the table n start revising..
n like i said in the previous post, i kne i sound hush n impatient when i explain solutions.. but i always try to change my tone when i realise it.. tat's something tat i muz say i tried to do.. but mayb u're already hurt by my tone in the first half that u didnt hear the gentler tone for the 2nd half..
btw, i hav nv refused to help explain solutions when i'm being asked.. i try to explain the best i can.. although it's obvious nw tat no one's gonna ask me anithing.. but i hav nv refused to help.. i tried to help even when i kne i'm nt good at explaining things.. n when ever i try to explain, things go the wrong way..
haiz.. i dunno wat to say..
mayb wat alvin said wont work in this situation.. i dont think saying sorry will resolve this problem.. coz the problem lies in me n sorry wont work.. i've gotta change but changing isnt easy n i need guidance.. i need help.. but would anithing be diff.. mayb yes, mayb no.. coz i guess the hatred is so deep tat even if i change, nothing would be seen as worthwhile..
but aniway, i'm sorry for being an asshole..
blue @ 10:29 AM
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Monday, August 13, 2007
i kne i suck big time.. n i kne i dont deserve the friendship of anione..
i'm sorry that i took up certain post to jus get cca points so i can get into uni.. and i kne that i shd put more heart into my responsibilities..
i kne tat whenever i try to help explain parts of sch work tat others dun understand, i tend to sound almighty n i sound as though i wanna get thru the process fast n tat i dont seem to think it's worth explaining.. i kne i sound like tat.. n everytime when i realised it when i'm already halfway thru, i try to change my tone.. i'm really sorry tat i sound tat way.. but i jus cant help it.. n i really dun mean to sound tat way.. n i'm really willing to help.. it's jus things dun come out the right way..
n i kne i dont do wat i'm supposed to do..
it really sucks to be in this situation n i kne i'm all to be blamed..
mayb even when i try to explain, they'll all jus sound like excuses.. but i guess i deserve it..
i'm sorry if i made u all upset.. i kne u all think i suck big time.. n i kne u all dont treat me as a friend animore.. i'm sorry..
blue @ 11:46 PM
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i got this joke from johnny's other blog.. haha.. i cant help it but to put it here for u guys to see.. haha.. super funny..
有一天,小白兔妹妹出去玩,回家時迷路了,走到一個三岔路口,正好來了一隻小灰兔。白兔妹妹就問道:「灰兔哥哥,妹妹迷路了,能告訴我怎麼走嗎?」灰兔見白兔妹妹單身一人,便不懷好意的說:「想知道嗎?」白兔說:「當然想知道哪,你快說吧。」灰兔說:「想知道,就讓哥高興高興!」。於是,白兔讓灰兔高興了高興,完事後,灰兔一指左邊,白兔於是向前走了。
一會兒,白兔又來到了一個三岔路口,這可怎麼辦,正好又來了一隻小黑兔,於是,白兔妹妹就問道:「黑兔哥哥,妹妹迷路了,能告訴我怎麼走嗎?」黑兔見白兔妹妹單身一人,也便不懷好意的說:「想知道嗎?」白兔說:「當然想知道哪,你快說吧。」黑兔說:「想知道,就讓哥高興高興!」。於是,白兔讓黑兔高興了高興,完事後,灰兔一指左邊,白兔於是向前走了。
白兔回到家,不久後,生下了一窩小兔子,你猜一猜,小兔子是什麼顏色?猜對我請客。
有人猜是白色,你說不對 有人猜是黑色,你說不對,再猜,猜是灰色,你說不對,再猜 猜是雜色,你說還不對.........
有人問:那你說是什麼顏色
你說:想知道嗎?
他說:想知道
你說:想知道?
hehe
想知道,就讓哥高興高興
hahah.. dont' u tink this is super funny.. LOL
blue @ 11:27 PM
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Monday, August 06, 2007
finally, CES is over.. haha.. today's test is like shit.. i'm sure i wont score, but at least i kne i shd be able to pass.. n i'm okay wif it..
PM will be on this coming friday.. zzz.. super lazy to study.. esp when thurs is holiday.. actually, this week is like holiday already.. coz today slack after the test, den tml no need go sch.. wed can choose nt to go, but since muz go find supplier, gotta go.. thurs is national day, fri onli go for the test at 5pm.. so it's relaxing this week..
i guess it's good that i dont hav to spend too much time in sch this days.. it's really a torture for me.. i feel so neglected n ignored.. i really feel like dying when i'm in sch.. seriously, i dont kne wat happened or wat i did to make them treat me like an invisible.. i do appologise for watever i've done that made u angry/pissed of with me.. but could u at least tell me wat i did? i really feel like dying when i hav to stay at the back of the group so i wont be in the way of anione n i wont invade their privacy.. esp when they talk wif everyone except me..
haiz.. i dunno lah.. really wanna die liaoz.. super feel like jus skiping sch.. mayb even disappearing n let the gang cool down first b4 i appear again.. i hate it when such things happen.. seem like i'm cursed or sumting.. i always lose my frenz for no reason, or some reason which i dont kne or mayb i'm jus nt "friend-material"... zzz..
can someone jus kill me literally.. i really wanna die.. feel so fucked up.. zzz..
why muz i always lose those pple i treasure the most.. when i thought they are the pple i'll rmb for the rest of my life wif a group of others, den i suddenly lose them for sum reason that i dun understand.. haiz..
=(
i'm so depressed..
blue @ 10:24 PM
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